it generally means that I've had a bad day..
I think that's a nice reminder myself. I had a guy screaming at me the other day for no apparent reason and one half of me was tempted to go out and snap back. ..
Anyway, I resisted the temptation and moved on. 'He must have had a bad day' - I thought. And didn't lose twice... :)
(Here's more on losing twice from 'Both sides of the table'
--
It reminds me of when somebody cuts you off in their car on a highway. Sure, he (and let’s face it – it’s always a “he”) is a jerk. But you can’t change it. Aside from being dangerous to chase him and wag your finger at him, you’ve suddenly gotten your heart rate up 20 points. You lose twice.
There are many times in life where taking the wrong path causes you to lose twice. Know the difference between fighting (and enjoying it) or giving in, letting go of the angst and choosing to be zen. So in business when it’s time to fight – fight. When it’s time to concede or compromise – do so graciously. Don’t lose twice
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Friday, August 20, 2010
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
'You've Told Me This Before'
How many times have we heard people we love re-tell THAT story again and again with lots of passion and excitement..
Sometimes done out of passion, other times out of excitement and yet some others just out of context and a will to share..
And how many times have we laughed or pulled their legs about it and said 'Yeah, you've told me this before'
After making a mental note about this, today, for the first time, I resisted the urge to say so and just smiled and listened. It was hard but it was a small victory and a small effort that went a long way in not raining on a loved one's parade..
I'm not sure how much of a difference it made to my listeners but it gave me that warm, fuzzy feeling on the inside..
Here's to doing this more often..
Sometimes done out of passion, other times out of excitement and yet some others just out of context and a will to share..
And how many times have we laughed or pulled their legs about it and said 'Yeah, you've told me this before'
After making a mental note about this, today, for the first time, I resisted the urge to say so and just smiled and listened. It was hard but it was a small victory and a small effort that went a long way in not raining on a loved one's parade..
I'm not sure how much of a difference it made to my listeners but it gave me that warm, fuzzy feeling on the inside..
Here's to doing this more often..
Saturday, August 14, 2010
How To Dance In The Rain
It was a busy morning, about 8:30, when an elderly gentleman in his
80's arrived to have stitches removed from his thumb. He said he was
in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00 am.
I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be
over an hour before someone would to able to see him. I saw him
looking at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another
patient, I would evaluate his wound. On exam, it was well healed, so I
talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his
sutures and redress his wound.
While taking care of his wound, I asked him if he had another doctor's
appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry.
The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to
eat breakfast with his wife. I inquired as to her health.
He told me that she had been there for a while and that she was a
victim of Alzheimer's Disease.
As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late.
He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not
recognized him in five years now.
I was surprised, and asked him, 'And you still go every morning, even
though she doesn't know who you are?'
He smiled as he patted my hand and said,
'She doesn't know me, but I still know who she is.'
I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm, and thought,
'That is the kind of love I want in my life.'
True love is neither physical, nor romantic.
True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be.
With all the jokes and fun that are in e-mails, sometimes there is one
that comes along that has an important message. This one I thought I
could share with you.
The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of everything;
they just make the best of everything they have.
I hope you share this with someone you care about. I just did.
'Life isn't about how to survive the storm,
but how to dance in the rain.'
80's arrived to have stitches removed from his thumb. He said he was
in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00 am.
I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be
over an hour before someone would to able to see him. I saw him
looking at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another
patient, I would evaluate his wound. On exam, it was well healed, so I
talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his
sutures and redress his wound.
While taking care of his wound, I asked him if he had another doctor's
appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry.
The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to
eat breakfast with his wife. I inquired as to her health.
He told me that she had been there for a while and that she was a
victim of Alzheimer's Disease.
As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late.
He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not
recognized him in five years now.
I was surprised, and asked him, 'And you still go every morning, even
though she doesn't know who you are?'
He smiled as he patted my hand and said,
'She doesn't know me, but I still know who she is.'
I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm, and thought,
'That is the kind of love I want in my life.'
True love is neither physical, nor romantic.
True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be.
With all the jokes and fun that are in e-mails, sometimes there is one
that comes along that has an important message. This one I thought I
could share with you.
The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of everything;
they just make the best of everything they have.
I hope you share this with someone you care about. I just did.
'Life isn't about how to survive the storm,
but how to dance in the rain.'
Why Tata Is A Respected Name In India
This is why Tata is a Respected name in India
-------
Meeting with H N Srinivas – Senior Executive Vice President, Taj Group of Hotels
------
Last evening, I had a dinner meeting with HNS in Goa (I was there for a National Institute of Personnel Management conference – as a speaker).
He narrated the 26th November 2008 terror attack on Taj Mumbai and there were some important points.
A. Terrorist entry
1. They entered from the Leopold Colaba hotel entrance and also from the northern entrance – spraying indiscriminate bullets on the Taj security personnel and guests in general.
2. Though Taj had a reasonable security – they were surely not equipped to deal with terrorists who were spraying 6 bullets per trigger.
3. The strategy of the terrorists was to throw chunks of RDX in an open area that will explode and burn – creating chaos so that the guests and staff run helter skelter so that the terrorists could kill them. The idea was to create maximum casualties.
4. There were several critical gatherings and functions happening in the hotel on that day – a Bohra wedding, global meet of Unilever CEOs and Board members and 2 other corporate meetings were being held in the hotel – besides the usual crowd.
5. The firing and chaos began at about 8.30 p.m. and the staff including employees on casual and contract basis displayed exemplary presence of mind, courage and sacrifice to protect the guests who were in various halls and conference rooms.
B. Stories of Staff Heroics
1. A young lady guest relation executive with the HLL gathering stopped any of the members going out and volunteered 3 times to go out and get stuff such as ice cubes for whiskey of the guests when the situation outside the hall was very explosives and she could have been easily the target of the bullets
2. Thomas George a captain escorted 54 guests from a backdoor staircase and when he was going down last he was shot by the terrorists
3. There were 500 emails from various guests narrating heroics of the staff and thanking them for saving their lives
4. In a subsequent function, Ratan Tata broke down in full public view and sobbed saying – “the company belongs to these people”. The wife of Thomas George who laid his life saving others said, she and the kids were proud of the man and that she did not know that for 25 years she lived with a man who was so courageous and brave
5. The episode happened on 26th November, a significant part of the hotel was burnt down and destroyed – the hotel was re-opened on 21st December and all the employees of the hotel were paraded in front of the guests
6. It was clearly a saga of extra-ordinary heroics by ordinary people for their organisation and in a way for their country. The sense of duty and service was unprecedented
7. The young lady who protected and looked after the HLL guests was a management trainee and we often speak of juniority and seniority in the organisation. She had no instructions from any supervisor to do what she did
a. She took just 3 minutes to rescue the entire team through the kitchen
b. Cars were organised outside the hotel as per seniority of the members
c. In the peak of the crisis, she stepped out and got the right wine glass for the guest
8. People who exhibited courage included janitors, waiters, directors, artisans and captains – all level of people
C. The Tata Gesture
1. All category of employees including those who had completed even 1 day as casuals were treated on duty during the time the hotel was closed
2. Relief and assistance to all those who were injured and killed
3. The relief and assistance was extended to all those who died at the railway station, surroundings including the “Pav-Bhaji” vendor and the pan shop owners
4. During the time the hotel was closed, the salaries were sent my money order
5. A psychiatric cell was established in collaboration with Tata Institute of Social Sciences to counsel those who needed such help
6. The thoughts and anxieties going on people’s mind was constantly tracked and where needed psychological help provided
7. Employee outreach centers were opened where all help, food, water, sanitation, first aid and counseling was provided. 1600 employees were covered by this facility
8. Every employee was assigned to one mentor and it was that person’s responsibility to act as a “single window” clearance for any help that the person required
9. Ratan Tata personally visited the families of all the 80 employees who in some manner – either through injury or getting killed – were affected.
10. The dependents of the employees were flown from outside Mumbai to Mumbai and taken care off in terms of ensuring mental assurance and peace. They were all accommodated in Hotel President for 3 weeks
11. Ratan Tata himself asked the families and dependents – as to what they wanted him to do.
12. In a record time of 20 days, a new trust was created by the Tatas for the purpose of relief of employees.
13. What is unique is that even the other people, the railway employees, the police staff, the pedestrians who had nothing to do with Tatas were covered by compensation. Each one of them was provided subsistence allowance of Rs. 10K per month for all these people for 6 months.
14. A 4 year old granddaughter of a vendor got 4 bullets in her and only one was removed in the Government hospital. She was taken to Bombay hospital and several lacs were spent by the Tatas on her to fully recover her
15. New hand carts were provided to several vendors who lost their carts
16. Tata will take responsibility of life education of 46 children of the victims of the terror
17. This was the most trying period in the life of the organisation. Senior managers including Ratan Tata were visiting funeral to funeral over the 3 days that were most horrible
18. The settlement for every deceased member ranged from Rs. 36 to 85 lacs in addition to the following benefits:
a. Full last salary for life for the family and dependents
b. Complete responsibility of education of children and dependents – anywhere in the world
c. Full Medical facility for the whole family and dependents for rest of their life
d. All loans and advances were waived off – irrespective of the amount
e. Counselor for life for each person
D. Epilogue
1. How was such passion created among the employees? How and why did they behave the way they did?
2. The organisation is clear that it is not something that someone can take credit for. It is not some training and development that created such behaviour. If someone suggests that – everyone laughs
3. It has to do with the DNA of the organisation, with the way Tata culture exists and above all with the situation that prevailed that time. The organisation has always been telling that customers and guests are #1 priority
4. The hotel business was started by Jamshedji Tata when he was insulted in one of the British hotels and not allowed to stay there.
5. He created several institutions which later became icons of progress, culture and modernity. IISc is one such institute. He was told by the rulers that time that he can acquire land for IISc to the extent he could fence the same. He could afford fencing only 400 acres.
6. When the HR function hesitatingly made a very rich proposal to Ratan – he said – do you think we are doing enough?
7. The whole approach was that the organisation would spend several hundred crore in re-building the property – why not spend equally on the employees who gave their life?
-------
Meeting with H N Srinivas – Senior Executive Vice President, Taj Group of Hotels
------
Last evening, I had a dinner meeting with HNS in Goa (I was there for a National Institute of Personnel Management conference – as a speaker).
He narrated the 26th November 2008 terror attack on Taj Mumbai and there were some important points.
A. Terrorist entry
1. They entered from the Leopold Colaba hotel entrance and also from the northern entrance – spraying indiscriminate bullets on the Taj security personnel and guests in general.
2. Though Taj had a reasonable security – they were surely not equipped to deal with terrorists who were spraying 6 bullets per trigger.
3. The strategy of the terrorists was to throw chunks of RDX in an open area that will explode and burn – creating chaos so that the guests and staff run helter skelter so that the terrorists could kill them. The idea was to create maximum casualties.
4. There were several critical gatherings and functions happening in the hotel on that day – a Bohra wedding, global meet of Unilever CEOs and Board members and 2 other corporate meetings were being held in the hotel – besides the usual crowd.
5. The firing and chaos began at about 8.30 p.m. and the staff including employees on casual and contract basis displayed exemplary presence of mind, courage and sacrifice to protect the guests who were in various halls and conference rooms.
B. Stories of Staff Heroics
1. A young lady guest relation executive with the HLL gathering stopped any of the members going out and volunteered 3 times to go out and get stuff such as ice cubes for whiskey of the guests when the situation outside the hall was very explosives and she could have been easily the target of the bullets
2. Thomas George a captain escorted 54 guests from a backdoor staircase and when he was going down last he was shot by the terrorists
3. There were 500 emails from various guests narrating heroics of the staff and thanking them for saving their lives
4. In a subsequent function, Ratan Tata broke down in full public view and sobbed saying – “the company belongs to these people”. The wife of Thomas George who laid his life saving others said, she and the kids were proud of the man and that she did not know that for 25 years she lived with a man who was so courageous and brave
5. The episode happened on 26th November, a significant part of the hotel was burnt down and destroyed – the hotel was re-opened on 21st December and all the employees of the hotel were paraded in front of the guests
6. It was clearly a saga of extra-ordinary heroics by ordinary people for their organisation and in a way for their country. The sense of duty and service was unprecedented
7. The young lady who protected and looked after the HLL guests was a management trainee and we often speak of juniority and seniority in the organisation. She had no instructions from any supervisor to do what she did
a. She took just 3 minutes to rescue the entire team through the kitchen
b. Cars were organised outside the hotel as per seniority of the members
c. In the peak of the crisis, she stepped out and got the right wine glass for the guest
8. People who exhibited courage included janitors, waiters, directors, artisans and captains – all level of people
C. The Tata Gesture
1. All category of employees including those who had completed even 1 day as casuals were treated on duty during the time the hotel was closed
2. Relief and assistance to all those who were injured and killed
3. The relief and assistance was extended to all those who died at the railway station, surroundings including the “Pav-Bhaji” vendor and the pan shop owners
4. During the time the hotel was closed, the salaries were sent my money order
5. A psychiatric cell was established in collaboration with Tata Institute of Social Sciences to counsel those who needed such help
6. The thoughts and anxieties going on people’s mind was constantly tracked and where needed psychological help provided
7. Employee outreach centers were opened where all help, food, water, sanitation, first aid and counseling was provided. 1600 employees were covered by this facility
8. Every employee was assigned to one mentor and it was that person’s responsibility to act as a “single window” clearance for any help that the person required
9. Ratan Tata personally visited the families of all the 80 employees who in some manner – either through injury or getting killed – were affected.
10. The dependents of the employees were flown from outside Mumbai to Mumbai and taken care off in terms of ensuring mental assurance and peace. They were all accommodated in Hotel President for 3 weeks
11. Ratan Tata himself asked the families and dependents – as to what they wanted him to do.
12. In a record time of 20 days, a new trust was created by the Tatas for the purpose of relief of employees.
13. What is unique is that even the other people, the railway employees, the police staff, the pedestrians who had nothing to do with Tatas were covered by compensation. Each one of them was provided subsistence allowance of Rs. 10K per month for all these people for 6 months.
14. A 4 year old granddaughter of a vendor got 4 bullets in her and only one was removed in the Government hospital. She was taken to Bombay hospital and several lacs were spent by the Tatas on her to fully recover her
15. New hand carts were provided to several vendors who lost their carts
16. Tata will take responsibility of life education of 46 children of the victims of the terror
17. This was the most trying period in the life of the organisation. Senior managers including Ratan Tata were visiting funeral to funeral over the 3 days that were most horrible
18. The settlement for every deceased member ranged from Rs. 36 to 85 lacs in addition to the following benefits:
a. Full last salary for life for the family and dependents
b. Complete responsibility of education of children and dependents – anywhere in the world
c. Full Medical facility for the whole family and dependents for rest of their life
d. All loans and advances were waived off – irrespective of the amount
e. Counselor for life for each person
D. Epilogue
1. How was such passion created among the employees? How and why did they behave the way they did?
2. The organisation is clear that it is not something that someone can take credit for. It is not some training and development that created such behaviour. If someone suggests that – everyone laughs
3. It has to do with the DNA of the organisation, with the way Tata culture exists and above all with the situation that prevailed that time. The organisation has always been telling that customers and guests are #1 priority
4. The hotel business was started by Jamshedji Tata when he was insulted in one of the British hotels and not allowed to stay there.
5. He created several institutions which later became icons of progress, culture and modernity. IISc is one such institute. He was told by the rulers that time that he can acquire land for IISc to the extent he could fence the same. He could afford fencing only 400 acres.
6. When the HR function hesitatingly made a very rich proposal to Ratan – he said – do you think we are doing enough?
7. The whole approach was that the organisation would spend several hundred crore in re-building the property – why not spend equally on the employees who gave their life?
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
A Cheery Hello To My Favorite Manic-Depressive Writers
It feels like a bad day. I feel like a total goof up, in a foul mood, pulling long faces and throwing sullen temper tantrums. Am unreasonably jealous of anyone else's good fortune today... and of course..Everyone's perfect lives and family... Am sure that today's beauty will go unappreciated.
Ironically, it's Plath and Woolf who offer me comfort on my bad days and a pressing sensitivity on my precariously happy days. These depressed women should technically not be important at all because sadness should not be not important. It is proof of waste, a symptom of loss. Get over it, I say, focus on the future. But we like to meditate on the past don't we? There's so much to learn from sorrow, if one cares to dissect it into its constituent elements. Mostly, however, one does no such thing; one tends to focus exclusively on the pain of it, for the exquisite sense of awareness it brings.
Both of these writers are so empathetic, life must have been one excruciating affair for them, as clearly seen from one's compulsion to test the boiling point of brain by sticking her head into an oven and the other's mid day stroll down to the middle of a rushing river with stones in her pockets. What hell it should be for having no respite from reality! No precious illusions, nothing to quiet the questions, the inability or perhaps the unwillingness to find any answers. The world we see through their eyes is drenched in meaning. A world over which loomed an inevitable darkness. A beautiful world but also a sad world- a frozen moment before the thing of beauty wastes away or mutates into something terrible. In fact, that is just hearsay from Rilke:
For beauty is nothing but the beginning of terror, which we are still just able to endure,
and we are so awed because it serenely disdains to annihilate us.
Every angel is terrifying.
(Duino Elegies)1912 to 1922
Oh well..This one's to everybody out there who's depressed/sad or anything of that sort..Just a reassurance that you arent the only person so..
Have a nice day :)
Ironically, it's Plath and Woolf who offer me comfort on my bad days and a pressing sensitivity on my precariously happy days. These depressed women should technically not be important at all because sadness should not be not important. It is proof of waste, a symptom of loss. Get over it, I say, focus on the future. But we like to meditate on the past don't we? There's so much to learn from sorrow, if one cares to dissect it into its constituent elements. Mostly, however, one does no such thing; one tends to focus exclusively on the pain of it, for the exquisite sense of awareness it brings.
Both of these writers are so empathetic, life must have been one excruciating affair for them, as clearly seen from one's compulsion to test the boiling point of brain by sticking her head into an oven and the other's mid day stroll down to the middle of a rushing river with stones in her pockets. What hell it should be for having no respite from reality! No precious illusions, nothing to quiet the questions, the inability or perhaps the unwillingness to find any answers. The world we see through their eyes is drenched in meaning. A world over which loomed an inevitable darkness. A beautiful world but also a sad world- a frozen moment before the thing of beauty wastes away or mutates into something terrible. In fact, that is just hearsay from Rilke:
For beauty is nothing but the beginning of terror, which we are still just able to endure,
and we are so awed because it serenely disdains to annihilate us.
Every angel is terrifying.
(Duino Elegies)1912 to 1922
Oh well..This one's to everybody out there who's depressed/sad or anything of that sort..Just a reassurance that you arent the only person so..
Have a nice day :)
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